Self-Doubt=Chaotic Hell

Oh man, if I only had a nickel for every time I doubted myself id be a billionaire but that's not the way the world works. However, do not give into self-doubt that's Satan's playground. Once he gets in your mind your really up hell creek for a while until, I did this for far too long and I am here to tell y'all about it.

I doubted myself in team roping and rodeo, I doubted myself in flying before as well. I have also doubted myself in relationships as well, I really have doubted myself in lots of aspects. For these times, were times I was extremely obnoxious to be around and was coming off the opposite of the way I felt. I was coming across overly confident at times in ways spoke to people, however I felt scared for my life that whole time. As well, I felt at time my mind sucked out of my skull or in my skull and when for example whenever relationships get around the region of my mind or in region of my mind. That causes me to feel inferior, self-doubt on being good enough and so forth.

That can cause me to feel like a magnet on my mind sucking all the goodness out and filling all other parts with thoughts of other stuff, and I was using relationships as an example because that's common for all people. That common ground for all, but it was that way after my accident for a while with the loss of flying and team roping and rodeo.

Y'all, you know who the shames on though, happens to be me for putting up with it and not using good common sense, I mean I was crushed career goal prior to motivation was corporate pilot was gone. I still have a bright future, fought for a bright future which you can still have a bright future after a horrible accident.

For example, having a good successful life is completely possible after a traumatic brain injury recovery as well as spinal cord injury recovery. Yes, may look different and be in different ways, and it will hurt celebrating walking a 5K and 1K and not running and walking and being the only injured person there. But being there, I am showing I am not backing down from my injuries and I overcame them.

My 5K and 1K walks looks like, when singer/artist Jelly Roll said he wants to be on cover of Men's Health after his weight loss, and all he is doing. Yes, y'all that looks much different but there was so much he overcame mentally and physically, he still has a way to go, but he looks great looks like different guy. But he is for certain a good candidate for that, because unlike many who make the cover, he had to change his mindset about food and eating.

Things many times are different than appear, especially than have played out in our minds because, I for certain have a torture device as a mind at times. My mind, will lock in like a sniper on target and obliterate that area of hurt with more wounding thoughts and crushing pain.

Do not let self-doubt of not being able to do certain stuff hold you back from anything, if I did that (and you can checkout one flight video on my website and see) I would be dead by now. Part of survival is overcoming self-doubt and being stronger than insecurities. If I gave into two every time, I felt inferior or less adequate or scared of being looked down on, man I wouldn't post anything, I wouldn't write anything, I would leave the house or get out of the bedroom. But I stay strong and have to overcome those because my life depends on it and bills do not pay themselves. Also, I would not have had the courage to put the bottle down.

Also, I drive my mom nuts at times needing so much reassurance on things because of self-doubt, or things I know but are weak in knowing because do not have strong feelings there that have made me feel otherwise within a certain time frame.

Do not drown in misery from self-doubt, do not let mistakes from your past be tragic downfall in current state or future. Stay strong, stay courageous and stay fighting!

Thank y'all God bless

Kyle Christiansen